Sorry, this is another post about my ramblings as opposed to writing, per se.
My Grandmothers memorial was beautiful, thank-you to all of you that came and for the wishes from those who could only be there in spirit. Bonnie, you did a fantastic job pulling the whole thing together.
I wrote Nana’s eulogy and while writing it was hard, reading it was much harder. I’m no stranger to reading in public, but there was too much emotion in the room. I managed to make it through. As always, my inner critic was loud. (c’mon say it with me like Yoda, I know you want to – the critic is strong in this one, yes?) I agonized that I hadn’t written enough, that I hadn’t included everyone, that I hadn’t captured what I wanted to say. Ultimately my worries were in vain, and I realize just to have said something was the key. Deep breath here.
It’s time now, I have to buckle down and get back to what I’m supposed to be doing, writing. To that end, I have written and I think I’ve solved my werewolf issues for Appetites, I critiqued two pieces and I submitted my next 20 pages for my critique group and again that damned inner critic snarled and frolicked in my head. “The writing is weak” it said, “The charaters; clichéd” it crowed. But again, it was proven wrong by my peers. BUT that won’t deter it from the next time.
Now about my critiquing. Remember that Inner critic? The one my mother keeps telling me to ignore? Well, it has its say in that too. Lucky for me, these writers, these word wizards, make it too easy. There is nothing to critique. The stories are strong, the characters are real. Really pleasures to read.
So, next weekend I’m off to a writing retreat to hopefully pound out the storyline for Appetites, and flesh out the characters, let them speak to me… so to speak.
Oh, and I’m bringing headphones and loud music. Let’s see that inner critic talk over that.